It's winter season and that means we can make all the "colder than a" jokes and puns. Cry all you can to let others know how cold you feel, share these colder than memes on your social profiles and laugh with your friends on these.
Be creative with these sayings and jokes when you explain how cold you feel.
Short and Funny Colder Than Sayings
Cold as Blixen.
It is as cold as balls.
It is colder than death.
Colder than hell’s hinges.
It’s colder than even death.
It’s colder than my ex-outside.
It is so cold my campfire froze.
Nothing is as cold as chemistry.
It is colder than the souls of men.
It is colder than within a freezer.
It is so cold my eyelids froze shut.
It’s colder than a day-old dumpling.
It’s colder than a penguin’s pecker.
It’s colder than Ted William’s head.
Colder than a well digger's hind end.
It’s colder than a polar bear’s butt.
It’s so cold, milk cows gave icicles.
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Do you count trembling as an exercise?
It’s colder than a witch’s belt buckle.
It is so cold my sweaters need sweaters.
It’s colder than a mortician’s mistress.
It’s colder than a mother-in-law’s kiss.
It’s colder than a fart in a dead Eskimo.
It’s colder than a grave digger’s shovel.
It’s colder than a room full of ex-wives.
It’s colder than in a freezer in Antarctica.
Colder than the high end of a good digger.
It is colder than the head of Ted William.
It is colder than the heart of a landlord.
It is colder than the pecker of a penguin.
It is so cold snowmen are migrating south.
It’s colder than a bucket of snowman piss.
It is colder than the butt-cheek of a seal.
It’s colder than Chris Cringle’s jockstrap.
The weather is almost colder than my heart.
Colder than a well digger's butt in January.
It is so cold the polar bears are shivering.
It’s colder than a Michael Jackson moonwalk.
Colder than a brass toilet seat in the Yukon.
It is colder than that person I loved before.
It is colder than the belt buckle of a witch.
It's colder than a... Jokes!
Whether you live in the USA, Canada, or Ice land, when it's cold we all feel like we are in Antarctica. Use these "Colder than" jokes when you have conversations with your friends to let them know how cold it is where you live.
It is so cold even property taxes are frozen.
It’s colder than the end of an Eskimo’s tool.
It is colder in comparison to the soul of men.
It is colder outside than even the North Pole.
It is colder than the kiss of a mother-in-law.
It is colder than the mistress of a mortician.
It is colder than the pajamas of a polar bear.
It is colder than the shovel of a gravedigger.
It is colder than the toenail of a polar bear.
It’s colder than Saddam’s current toilet seat.
It is colder than the heart of a tax collector.
It is colder than the heart of a whore outside.
It is so cold my boogers are freezing together.
It’s colder than skinny dipping in a snowstorm.
It is colder than a moonwalk of Michael Jackson.
It is colder than an Eskimo’s igloo or outhouse.
It is colder than any room packed with ex-wives.
It is so cold I could cut glass with my nipples.
The cold is such that my campfire became frozen.
It is colder than a blend of dry ice and acetone.
It is colder than the jockstrap of Chris Cringle.
It’s colder than a polar bear's toenail out there.
It is so cold even the dog wanted a cup of coffee.
The cold is such that my heartburn has been cured.
It’s so cold, ager bumps a-poppin' out all over me.
It is colder than the present toilet seat of Saddam.
It’s colder than a witch’s tit in a brass brassiere.
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Colder than... Sayings & Quotes
Colder than a toilet seat made of brass in the Yukon.
It is chillier than the fart of the lifeless Eskimos.
It is colder than a toilet top made from Tibetan tin.
It is so cold I’m using an ice tray as a heating pad.
The climate is almost colder as compared to my heart.
It is chillier in comparison to the tool of an Eskimo.
The cold is such that my teeth froze at the same time.
It is colder than a pail full of the piss of a snowman.
It is so cold it feels like I’m breathing liquid oxygen.
It’s so cold the dogs are sticking to the fire hydrants.
It is cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey.
It is so cold Bill Clinton is sleeping with his own wife.
It is so cold that icicles are produced by the milk cows.
The cold is such that even my eyelids of mine froze shut.
The cold is such that even the polar bears are trembling.
The cold is such that snowmen are going to migrate south.
The cold is such that my sweaters are in need of sweaters.
I do not want winter anymore. I want to go ahead to spring!
I farted snowflakes because it is extremely chilly outside.
It is colder than the hands of a dead gynecologist outside.
It is colder than a dumpling that happens to be one day old.
Colder than the butt of a good digger in the month of January.
It is colder as compared to the frost on a glass of champagne.
It is colder than the light of the moon falling on a tombstone.
It’s colder than when you walk out of the shower with no towel.
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It's so cold jokes...
The cold is such that I am feeling like inhaling liquid oxygen.
The cold was such that I ended up chipping a tooth on the soup.
The cold is such that even the property taxes have become frozen.
The cold is such that I needed to switch off the air-conditioner.
It is colder than the tit of a witch in a brassiere made of brass.
It is so cold my cat climbs into the refrigerator just to warm up.
It’s colder than Jack Frost’s toes after he skates on an icy pond.
The cold is such that both of my butt cheeks have jammed together.
The cold is such that even my boogers are going to freeze together.
It’s so cold that I was provided with a man-gina by the “shrinkage”.
The cold is such that any brass monkey’s balls will also get frozen.
It’s colder than a brass toilet seat on the shady side of an iceberg.
It’s so cold that one can watch the Golden Arches while peeing outside.
I am of the notion that this sculpture of batman was made only from ice.
The cold is such that Bill Clinton is sharing the bed with his own wife.
The cold is such that even the pooch desired to consume a cup of coffee.
The cold is such that dogs are attaching themselves to the fire hydrants.
The cold is such that even the squirrels were wearing thermal underpants.
It is colder than a toilet seat made of brass on the iceberg’s shady part.
The cold is such outside that I actually watched a gangsta pull up his pants.
It is so cold even global warming tree-huggers are wearing hats and mittens.
The cold is such that the cat of mine climbs the freeze only for warming up.
Long and Funny Colder Than Sayings
The cold is such that I am making use of an ice tray in place of a heating pad.
The cold is such that it will be possible for me to cut glass using my nipples.
The cold is such that the hookers in New York are distributing flannel condoms.
The cold was such that we ended up getting ice cream once the cows were milked.
Colder than a banker’s heart on foreclosure day at the widows’ and orphans’ home.
It is colder than the toes of Jack Frost following his skating in a freezing pond.
The cold was such that the teeth of my Grandpa had been chattering … in the glass!
The cold is such that mittens and hats are worn by even the global-warming tree-huggers.
It is so cold hookers were given free blow jobs just to get something warm in their stomachs.
It is so cold you can toss a cup of hot water in the air and hear it shatter into ice crystals.
In case cotton balls are dipped in water, they are going to stick to anything on a chilly night.
It is so chilly that even walking out of the washroom without a towel will not make you feel cold.
The cold was such that the squirrels had been tossing themselves at the electric fences in the park.
The cold is such that free blow jobs were given by the hookers for getting some warm stuff in their tummies.
The cold is such that once a cup of hot water is tossed by you in the air, it can be heard to smash into ice crystals.
The cold was such that the adolescents did not worry about acne anymore. Their new problem happened to me goose pimples.
